**I would like to apologise if this post ruins Disney movies for anyone... Please also note that I've not seen the FSOG movie, nor do I plan to, but I've read large parts of the trilogy online. Spoiler alert, they degrade women and healthy sexual relationships. And they really suck.**
With another Valentine's Day upon us, the lovely ladies of the Western world are flicking through their collection of romantic comedies whilst men debate between gardenia bouquets or a cluster of lilies. The day of love hearts and red roses is usually enough to render the bitter souls sick. However, there is no time to lie ill in bed! The release of the erotic/romance/kill-me-now film Fifty Shades of Grey is upon us, with everyone and their mum queueing up to get a ticket. Which is somewhat odd, considering that book to film adaptations are usually rather abhorrent.
But most book to film adaptations don't have boobs, billionaires, frequent sex scenes, Beyoncé infused soundtracks, hot shirtless Jamie Dornan... but most importantly, SEX!! Marvellous, frequent, dirty, unrestricted, passionate, intense sex! I hope you're getting this down!
Oddly enough, the reactions to the Fifty Shades of Grey book trilogy by E.L James were a mixture of rants from Internet trolls, cries of joy from ecstatic women and others who get a kick out of literary phlegm, and then there was the grey area (ha ha) of people who said that "it's just a book/freedom of speech/each to their own." And now, thanks to the miracle of the American film industry (which never ceases to amaze me), everyone can now view the debauchery in their nearest cinema! Hooray for sex and Beyoncé!
The film is being released close to Valentine's Day, which is utterly appropriate because Fifty Shades of Grey is indeed the love story of the century. In fact, E.L James herself is under the impression that her works are indeed a love story. You need to only look at her Tweets and comments in interviews to hear just how much she believes that bondage=love. And for her bank account, this belief has been most profitable; her books have sold over 70 million copies (globally), in 2012, Time Magazine named her one of "The Worlds Most Influential People" and it's sad to say that the fastest selling paperback in the UK bears her name. Also, earning $95 million in 2013 (plus $5 million in film rights) tells us that literature with substance is the stuff of idiots; sex sells. And with all three books available in countless language translations, no corner of the world is immune to the tyranny.
To the select few who don't know, Fifty Shades of Grey is essentially a story of girl meets man. Notice the age/maturity gap?
It is narrated by Anastasia Steele, the awkward, girl-next-door protagonist. She's a college student on the verge of graduating, with a steady part-time job. Anastasia isn't the kind of girl men adore, nor does she take her physical appearance seriously. Well, at least not until she meets Christian Grey, a businessman who's über good-looking, influential within the city and is basically like a young Rupert Murdoch. If Rupert Murdoch was 30 years old and had an affable public personality.
They meet through an interview, where Anastasia must ask Christian questions for the college newspaper. It goes awkwardly because...
Basically, Christian starts flirting with Anastasia and she's intimidated by how gorgeous, polite and charming he is. So she flips out and asks if he's gay and supposedly buggers everything up... BUT NOT FOR LONG!
Eventually, they meet up again and develop a flirtationship which escalates despite her friends telling Anastasia that Christian doesn't seem right. And once she learns that Christian is a seriously weird guy, she freaks out a little. But then he assures her that she's not like any other woman, she's the most beautiful person ever and there's no one else he'd rather chain up and abuse for pleasure.
Anastasia learns that Christian is seriously into BDSM and he wants her to be his partner, even though she's an "unworldly" awkward virgin and he's so gorgeous and "charismatic" and like "Adonis."
Let's pause for a moment. Does this sound familiar to anyone?
Yes, the parallels between Twilight and FSOG are uncanny. And the fact that FSOG was based off a Twilight fan-fiction that E.L James wrote is somewhat scary. But if you didn't notice the intertextuality between FSOG and Twilight, let's briefly look at it:
Assume that Bella Swan is Anastasia and that Edward Cullen is Christian. Bella is a wallflower who moves to a new school, despite being on the brink of graduating. She doesn't try to be cool or pretty and yet she still has several friends despite being the mopiest girl in Young Adult literature. Much like Anastasia, she isn't a particularly interesting person, with no apparent flaws. Both get good grades, both have their interests, both have dysfunctional families with crazy mothers who like to get married, and fathers that are really manly and don't like talking... Bella and Anastasia also don't chase after the opposite sex because no one really strikes their fancy; they both prefer the company of men found in the pages of classic books.
And then they meet The One. An insecurity about their personality develops and they now begin to feel bad about how they look. In Chapter 1 of FSOG, Anastasia thinks to herself I'm uncoordinated, scruffy and I'm not blonde. Throughout the entire Twilight Saga, Bella expresses a similar lament.
Both Edward and Christian are 'keen' to learn more about the lives of the two women, whilst avoiding discussing their own. Both men claim to "read people." And upon getting into the relationship that they themselves warned would be "dangerous", they shower expensive gifts upon the women.
Edward gives Bella a Mercedes whilst Christian gives to Anastasia a Macbook Pro; both of which are highly expensive, top of the range and unavailable for commercial purpose (at the time of publication). This is done to place Edward and Christian in a positive light by convincing the reader that these men are so devoted and generous to their (comparatively) humble women; they are devoted providers.
Both Christian and Edward utilise their age-gap over Anastasia and Bella to further control their lives, under the premise that it's to protect them. They're both chronic stalkers (e.g: phone tracing, sleep-watching). But really, both men childishly prove time and time again throughout their respective series that they're insecure about all the other guys in the lives of their girlfriends.
I could ramble about how E.L James lacks original ideas and I could go on about how plagiarism is a greater sin than her over-enthusiastic use of the English language and its descriptions, but that is not the main point of contention between the critics and the fans. FSOG could have been written in the manner of Shakespeare himself and it would still retain no moral value, nor anything to declare it legitimately romantic in any way.
In the novel, we can observe that Christian is reluctant to discuss his personal life with Anastasia. But with time, we learn of his traumatic childhood, his "crack whore" biological mother and his relationship with 'Mrs Robinson'; a woman who introduced a fifteen year old Christian to BDSM (I love how legal that must have been!). He states that his therapists can't do anything and in Chapter 16, he says "It's the way I'm made Anastasia. I need to control you." Every time he gives Anastasia a glimpse into his past, she thinks of the little child suffering and living in dark places, ignoring the man he grew up to become; a man who can only love through subjugation. She comes to believe that she has a positive effect on him, implying that women are meant to change their men and go out of their way to reform them from their horrid original selves (this is what passes for 'character development'?)
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| Not everyone is worth pain and humiliation at your own expense. Screw you Disney. |
The fact of the matter is that Christian Grey is manipulative, psychologically disturbed and consequently, the only way for him to truly grasp some sense of control over his world is to take the welfare of his 'submissives' into his own hands. Evidence of his strong need for control is seen in the contract he gives to Anastasia prior to commencing their dominant/submissive relationship. The darker ambitions that he has are written down and sugar coated in sentences like "the fundamental purpose of this contract is to allow the Submissive to explore her sensuality and her limits safely, with due respect and regard for her needs, her limits and her wellbeing." Later on in the same document, he makes it clear that if she signs this, he will have complete control over her diet/beauty and personal hygiene regimen, her appointed times to see him, her clothing choices, her own sex life amongst other things...
All of that, with the understanding that in return, he will provide her with everything she needs. Well, everything except an honest, sincere, loving and fulfilling relationship. But that's not important, not when she gets an Audi, a BlackBerry and a MacBook Pro!!
Anastasia must basically reshape herself and all parts of her life into whatever he commands her to, and she must do so respectfully or she will be punished. In fact, according to their contract, she is to be subjected to "discipline" such as "whippings, floggings, spankings, caning, paddling or anything else that the Dominant should decide to administer, without hesitation, enquiry or complaint."
A lesser known part of FSOG is that Anastasia is controlled by Christian, but is also subjected to pressure from her "inner goddess." The inner goddess is a separate yet internal consciousness within Anastasia that rejoices when she does naughty or bad things. It's kinda like the devil on her shoulder.
At moments where Anastasia questions the contract, the inner goddess coaxes her further away from rational thinking by filling Anastasia's head with reminders of fun sexual experiences she's had with Christian. When Anastasia is lulled into a false sense of security by this goddess, Christian swoops in and encourages her to research what they would be doing if she signed the contract. And with further temptations from Christian and scoldings from the goddess for daring to question the perfect Christian Grey, Anastasia is sucked into a world where the only person who gives her life any sense of meaning/purpose/security is the very man who corrupts her judgement and takes away her independence, purely because he "wants all her pleasure."
The fact that FSOG glorifies abusive/possessive relationships is as irrefutable as the sun that rises every day. All the evidence sits before us. Of course, there are people who prefer to live with their eyes closed because they find security within the darkness.
"It's just a book/movie" they whine. "Don't read/watch it if you don't like it." Such words have been duly noted by myself and others time and time again. And what does burying your head in the ground leave you with? Complete and utter ignorance of any external threats you've left yourself defenceless to.
We cover our eyes for many reasons, but usually it is out of either horror or shame. To hide ourselves from bitter truths and things that scare us is to remain ignorant and weak. If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything. If you don't know the Devil, you'll welcome his lies with open arms.
I believe that we are entitled to have opinions, but we owe it to ourselves to be educated about what we believe in. If you're going to have an opinion, it shouldn't be based on unstable things such as contradictory statements, lies, hatred and false truths. Be genuine, but don't be ignorant. Education and wisdom are infinitely more precious and worthwhile than any fleeting joy we find in things that do not last.
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| Just bear in mind that FSOG is an unsuitable whetstone; it is only for mopping up spills and campfire kindling. |
The world around us is forever changing and reinventing itself, and in the flurry, it has forgotten the core values of love, wisdom and everything that shouldn't be so rare to find these days. Seven billion beating hearts (and counting) in the world, and not enough love expressed every day. Seven billion brains in the world with scarcely a cell between them. It is my belief (as a Christian) that secularism is a poison and without the guidance of God, our sense of what's ethical and what's not is distorted. Things are changed to suit to suit our beliefs and intentions (as opposed to those of God) and our moral code becomes a safe haven for practicing anarchy.
Of course, I cannot expect everyone who reads this to believe in my God. But if it pleases you, I hope that you share this one belief; that the children of this future are precious.
We cannot let the children of the future believe that sexual relationships are freely open to interpretation. We shouldn't let our children be influenced to believe that the opposite sex is to be objectified or categorised in a certain manner or that anyone who acts a 'certain way' wants to have sex. If it is reprehensible for children to be imported and exported around the world as sexual slaves, how is it acceptable to look into the eyes of your own son/daughter and determine if they would be a Dominant or a Submissive later on in life?
All around us is the glorification of the dark side of sex. Stalking is scarcely considered perverse, debasement of matrimonial values is becoming the norm, and the lines between abuse and pleasure are blurring into something ghastly. Conservative behaviour is seen as a joke, respectability is a radical thing and people who abstain from sexual relationships are seen as nutters.
To further complicate things, everyone is entitled to live their lives how they choose. Bonus points if they do so under pressure. More bonus points if they have an otherwise successful/happy life. Yet why should we live in ignorance if there is every opportunity to learn things and strengthen our minds?
I acknowledge that children do grow up and become adults that are (hopefully) capable of making their own choices whilst dealing with everything responsibly. I myself am on the borderline between adolescence and adulthood, and the ability to do as I please is quite delightful. But for others like me and for the children of the future to not understand that we are all precious, it leaves us open to accepting that it's OK to be disrespected and undermined, no matter the motive of the abuser. If people believe that they're not worthy of love and compassion then they forever live a life believing that they are worth nothing.
We need to ensure that no one is left without access to the truth and to education. We need to respect the integrity of others and remain true to ourselves. And we need to teach our children that love is not chains and whips. True love is not found in shades of grey. The best way to find it is to read a Bible or go to a good church with a loving congregation, but that's only the beginning of what worked for me and many other wholly satisfied souls.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres"- 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7 (NIV)
The moral of this highly erotic post is that Fifty Shades of Grey is not a love story. Do not say otherwise, it hurts the minds of smart people.
Links That Provided Information:
- E. L. James (Wikipedia)
- Fifty Abusive Moments In Fifty Shades of Grey
- E L James: The shy housewife behind Fifty Shades of Grey
- A PDF online copy of the first book in the Fifty Shades trilogy
