Then months ago, it dawned on me that when it came to the social scene, I do have an odd habit of being a complete lemon, so that became the catalyst towards The Social Botany Scale.
For legal purposes, every definition was created by me and this whole social scale is legally mine by copyright. If I find out you've stolen this but not referenced me or my efforts, you will be hunted down and destroyed.
In any other case, please feel free to use this scale. I'd just like to be credited for my contributions towards social science (which is a legitimate science, also known as psychology).
Social Algae: A bit of a mix-up of the water lily
and the mould. They are OCD, very weird (bad weird) and their intense weirdness
just about sucks away your happiness.
Social Apple: Whether they’re red or green,
they’re just normal cool people. The best ones are usually geeky and adore
technology.
Social Apple Tree: A Social Apple that’s advanced
beyond their years. They might have done great things with their life, or at
least be about to, but they mainly inspire others to do well with just a hit of
inspiration.
Social Aubergine: They like to think that they’re
dignified and sophisticated, but we can all tell that they’re a try hard Bogan.
Social Bamboo: They’re stiff, wooden and usually
tall and skinny. Very prim and proper.
Social Banana: Most of the time you can deduce
their personality by looking at their surface. But sometimes everything looks
normal on the surface and deep on the inside, you never know what you’ll find.
Social
Bonsai: These people are either high maintenance or suffer from
OCD. Everything about them must be perfect or something’ll go wrong
Social Blueberry: Somewhat sour and
unappealing on first encounters. After the first few encounters that sourness
develops into a pleasant tartness and the sweetness and flavour is noticeable.
Social Cactus: On the inside, they are what they
look like; mean, prickly and dangerous. Only those special pigs will have
anything to do with them.
Social Carrot: The coolest people you will ever
meet. Literally, they’re bright and physically good to look at. Until they get
all hot headed and cooked, in which case they have now become an irreversibly
horrible human being.
Social Celery: A person who at first isn’t
particularly interesting or exciting, but somehow you still find yourself
associating with them and then their company isn’t as bad as you initially
thought. However, when it comes to acting, they deliver a very bland and
tasteless performance.
Social Chilli: A person who looks perfectly safe
on the outside, but after investigation, it turns out that they’re
astonishingly hard to handle and full of intensity.
Social Christmas tree: a person who considers themselves
to be religious and holy, but is really just an arrogant wannabe with no
legitimate faith.
Social Compost: Not necessarily a person, but
people who’ve started out good and have since gone bad. Society recognises
that, and then they become rejects. Or anyone who delves into criminal activity
and gets caught. (This also applies to anyone who is/deserves to be the lowest
of the low)
Social Coral: Not really somebody you’d want to
hang around with. When handled the wrong way or walked over, you run the risk
of getting cut. They’re not violent, but they’re very hard and tough and their
words are very cutting.
Social Daisy: Every time these people fall in
love with someone and word gets around; they get picked on.
Social Dragon fruit: Gorgeous and showy on
the outside, but rather bland and grey (though potentially still pleasant) on
the inside.
Social Eggplant: They’re tacky and disgusting but
proud to admit it.
Social Eucalyptus Tree: They just stand around and look
completely average and appear to do nothing. But don’t mention fire around
them; they’re the pyromaniacs of society.
Social Fungus: They aren’t nice to look at and
they’re generally highly toxic, but I guess the rainforests need them. This is
a label best given to accountants and politicians.
Social Grape: The sort of people that may look
decent now, but they’re going to look hideous when they’re older, due to the
fact that if they get crushed right, they can become alcoholic.
Social Grass: The most normal people you’ll ever
meet when kept in order. Remove the discipline and BAM! They’re wild. Then
along comes a lawn mower and they revert back to normality.
Social Heather: It’s beautiful, it smells amazing
and it has Scottish ancestry.
Social Hedge: They require constant attention
and/or discipline or they’ll go all crazy and wild.
Social Hibiscus: If not for the large proboscis-like
appendage in the middle of their face, they’d be pretty decent looking.
Social Ivy: When given the chance, they
dominate the social scene. Or their influence does. If you’re a weird person,
this shouldn’t bother you at all.
Social Kiwi Fruit: Not necessarily from New Zealand at
all. They’re really really really really REALLY hairy! And on the inside,
they’re either really nice or really yucky. And their guts look feral (but so does
everyone’s)
Social Lemon: They can be amazing when teamed up
with others, but in rare cases, they just stand/sit there so very awkwardly.
Social Lemongrass: Not affiliated with Lemons, these
kinds of people can either: add flavour to life or keep the parasitic people
away. They’re odd in some way, but hey, they’re great to have around.
Social Maple Syrup: It’s sweet, goes with
everything, and you can never quite think of it without thinking of its
cultural background.
Social Mango: Indian and perfect.
Everyone loves them.
Social Marijuana: Their mere presence slows
everything down or makes things weirder. In the long run, you really don’t want
them around you at all…. And they usually smell really bad, but to the weak
minded, they’re absolutely wonderful.
Social Mould: When things aren’t kept in order,
this person infects on any goodness and makes it horrid. They’re just those
people who suck away your happiness and ruin your day simply by sight/smell….
Social Mushroom: Like the mycelia (roots) of
mushrooms, these people can make stories/speeches that can go on for ages.
They’re very unpleasant to some, instantly intriguing to some and an acquired
taste to others.
Social Nut: Hard exterior that exhibits a cold
and unwelcome appearance, but when you get to know them, they are quite
amazing!
Social Olive Branch: Someone (who may not even be a
Christian) who strives to live an honourable and wholesome life. They practice
what they preach and are devoted to what they believe to be right.
Social Onion: Someone with layers of bitterness
surrounding their inner self. Very insecure person that comes with a great deal
of emotional issues and tears.
Social Palm Tree: Best suited to exotic tropical
locations; watch out for coconuts. They also usually have some pretty epic hair.
Social Petrified Wood: Someone so fixated with history/the
old fashioned way of doing things, they base their lifestyle choices around
them.
Social Poison Ivy: Like the Social Ivy, but not cool
at all. They creep around everywhere and cause discomfort.
Social Potato (regular): They’re normal and fit in anywhere.
And should the need arise, they have the potential to do/be anything they
want/you tell them to be/do. Society sometimes has different outlooks on them;
they’re either boring, fabulous or just need some butter.
Social Potato (sweet): The most despicable people to roam the earth. They may seem
sweet and wonderful and good to some, but those with taste know the truth:
SWEET POTATOES ARE EVIL!
Social Rosebush: Even when it’s left to grow all
crazy, it’s still beautiful and smells amazing.
Social
Rose (Tudor): Like Social Heather but more English.
Social
Shamrock: Not to be confused with leprechauns, these people are
predominantly really pale and red haired, but definitely from Ireland. Or they
get drunk a lot. And after years of alcoholism, if they haven’t become a Social
Grape, then that’s the luck of the Irish.
Social Star fruit: They have a strongly
offensive odour. Some like them, but it takes a lot to get past the stench.
Social Strawberry: Sweet, beautiful and
entirely lovely, they seem amazing in almost every possible combination.
Social Tomato: Some people think they’re one
thing, others think they’re another. So by default, it doesn’t fit in anywhere
and should really be removed from society.
Social Triffid: A person who overly obsessed with
science fiction or fantasy. They are very defensive of their obsessions and
they won’t have any hesitation to attack you. (derived from the British sci-fi
novel “The Day of The Triffids” about killer plants that walk around on 3 legs
that came from outer space)
Social Tumbleweed: They just float around and do
bugger all. Generally they are really REALLY dumb.
Social Venus flytrap: They’re prone to getting angry and
aren’t afraid to bite people or beat them up
Social Water Lily: Overly obsessed with hygiene;
bathing in particular. Generally pale people, but the prettiest you’ll ever
meet.
Social Water: Tasteless on its own,
it never fails to take on the flavours of its surroundings. While not technically
a plant, it is present in all plants and is fundamental to the environment.
Social Weeping Willow: They hide their inner selves and
they just hang there and mope around. Emos, for example, are perfect examples
of this.
Social Wheat: They get hair cuts or dramatic hair
changes JUST as their hair looks perfect the way it is. Usually very tall and
skinny.
If you guys think I've missed anything or if you found this helpful in any way at all, let me know in the comments.
Many of these definitions are based on people in my life so if you don't know me and got offended; I'm sorry.
Vivmarie1407
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